Past ..

Just yesterday I heard this dialogue in the sitcom "Criminal Minds" that I am seeing now a days; Although I cannot recall the exact words but I want it to be the below

 

"You cannot make peace with your past  till you again sit with it".

 

And here today I was made to sit at the same location in my bus where I have spent endless months a year and so back. I was made to relive the same cutting yourself off from the whole world by plunging your ear phones tight in your ears as far as they could go, listening to high pitched songs , staring expectantly outside with occasional glances at the book I am reading.

 

Of course it was different this time, with having a more relaxing and in control experience instead of the agonishing one months back.

 

I did not question the reality of the quote but for sure did not expect it to be actually happening so soon.

 

The best thing I love about life is that its always unpredictable and thats why it hurts more when you try to preempt things and they don't go that way. So its always good to stop trying to predict it when you know that it will take its own unpredictable course :)

Life...

Life is so funny , just today in the morning I was thinking that I went to Khajaraho and someday someone will ask me about how to go there , how to plan etc etc and just few minutes back a friend called me and asked me exactly the same as they are planning to go there.

After having read the Secret , I am obliged to say that its all "Law of attraction" but somehow I don't think that its got anything to do with that.

I saw a Dream ...

I saw a dream,

No not while sleeping at night.

It was dream seen with open eyes,

in broad day light.

I saw a dream,

A dream of impossible sights.

Of places, cities and towns,

filled with faces happy n bright.

I saw a dream,

Of times when you can play in the sun and dance in the rain.

Or run like wind in the fields of grain.

I saw a dream,

Filled with moments of laughter,

Moments of joy,

Moments when you can behave like a one year old boy.

I saw a dream,

A dream of everything true,

When you don't have to be called fake,

You can be the way who are you.

I saw a dream,

Where dreams come true.

Where the one you love says I Love You.

I saw a dream,

people talking everyday.

Expressing what all they feel,

Saying all the things they have to say.

I saw a dream,

When I can be you,

You can be me.

When there are no separate God but only one thy.

I saw a dream,

Ya it was a dream,

A dream to see everything,

just like a dream.

I saw a dream. I saw a dream

Quote...

"We start our life fighting for the window seat and we end our life occupying the aisle seat so that we can run to the washroom uninterrupted "

Week that it was...

Well this was arguably one of the best week of my life. The week which may turn out to be the one which may change my life for good. Well it started with a two day training. Behavioral Trainings in my organization has a lovely flair. It brings people from different departments and line of work under the same roof and then indulges them into activities which not only gel them together but also makes them feel so comfortable with each other. Then came Wednesday. Don't know what happened or what I did differently but no doubt I may never forget it. The next two days turned out so different. Although professionally quite hectic but personally I never felt or behaved so differently. Nothing ground breaking happened but nevertheless it was good and hope it remains so.

Dream to have a dream....

I am one of those guys (don't know whether anyone else of my kind exist or not) who never had an ambition or a realistic dream. Its not that I don't dream but I see dreams as more of a medium to live those moments which are otherwise not possible. So contrary to what achievers believe in i.e. Dream is something that won't let you sleep but my dreams are something for which I need not sleep as I mostly day dream but they are definitly not something that will make me sleepless.So I think they are more of a wish than a dream.
When I was growing I never used to give the question "What you want to be when you grow up ?" much a thought. Ok I used to think that I will become an engineer not because I was fascinated with the kind of work they do because I really din't know what they do :) but it was more because of two reasons, one was that I used to think that Guys become engineer and Girls become doctor (don't know what gave birth to this statement) and secondly till 10th Biology for me was all about drawing things , and that was one part of my homework that my Didibhai used to do for me and I knew if I will pursue medical then someday I will have to do all the drwaing myself :p and that was impossible. The only thing I could draw was Amoeba because it does not have a definite shape so I had the liberty of drawing anything and then fill it with dots (used to love the sound of everyone banging the pencil on the paper repeatedly at the time of exams). Primarily I wanted to serve people and as I am believer of the fact that you need not be in defense forces to serve your country, I thought I will try to make people's life easier by being an Engineer.So since I got a good score in 10th, I opted for Non-Med.
I used to think that it will be fun to study PCM and I will learn a lot of things but the first day I joined my new school DPS, I found people being mad about getting into IIT (I din't knew what the heck it was, don't be surprised I din't know YMCA was an engineering college in Faridabad till the time I had to opt for a college). By the time I joined (July as result was out in June only), I found people have already done half of their syllabus in the promotional classes or in the coaching classes they have joined. Most of them have learned the various concepts that I was going to study. But to my surprise most of them knew the concepts but I guess none knew why we are studying it, whats the use of it, why are we learning differentiation, where will we use integration in our day to day life , what disaster will happen if we don't know about the organic chemistry etc. But I think I din't get the time to react or ask all these because if I had then I would have been left way behind so I just dropped my head and went ahead with all this. The two subjects for which I had a liking was Physics and Maths and Chemistry was left to the interest of the teacher who was teaching, if he could develop interest then I will learn otherwise I will take it as a routine.
Contrary to what most people believe, seeing my high marks, that I am a bookworm but I am not. This is one truth that only my mom knows because she only knows that till the day I completed my college she had to constantly force me to open them and study. I am more of a student who used to study on the last day before exam. Every time just before the exam I used to pray to God that please help me finish all this syllabus and I promise that I will study quite early next time but that next time never came. I feel I grasp things quickly thats why just by reading the books once I used to answer most of the questions and thus used to score goodmarks without studying for hours.
Coming back to my school, so since I was never fascinated myself to go for the IITs and it was more of Bhed chal (blindly following somebody) so I was never into it, so despite clearing the screening and I knew I could never break into IITs as I never put any effort for it, never studied hard, never did the sample papers, never did numerical problems and it would have been a miracle if I had. Ok I was disappointed even cried when the results were out. Somehow I studied well for the objectives exams and got really good rank in whichever paper I gave seriously and landed myself an opportunity to study in the NITs but later opted for my state cum local college YMCA.
The story at YMCA was no different. I don't know why I really opted for Electronics (and if you are working in an IT industry then you will know that ultimately it hardly matters what was your branch). Ok may be I was fascinated with something more core engineering than something which is mere a language.So Electronics was something which a good scorer who wants to do core engineering will opt for than Mechanical or Electrical just like Non-Medical to Commerce or Arts until you are really fascinated with the other options.
After opting for Electronics , I had to make another choice Electronics Engineering(Communications) or Electronics & Control. Ok Communications sounded more interesting and this is what tradition says higher ranker opted for. So here I was, in the EE group. Throughout the first 3 years, I went through the routines without challenging myself once or doing something that will challenge my potential and or give me a sense of an achievement. Then came the 6 semester when we had to get ourself a training for the next semester and the first option we had was HCL and seeing the tradition, I thought I will have to make it,so I prepared but somehow again felt that I could have done much better and as I never thought that I worked really hard for it so I will say it was luck that I got into it when some of my brilliant friends couldn't.
While studying Electronics I used to think that my work in VLSI will involve working with transistors, gates, ICs or other electronics and used to think that while doing that work I will be more interested in studying them as only studying them was not that fascinating.
During my training, I was aksed what in VLSI will you prefer and since they were looking for some one who has knowledge of C/C++ ,and since I matched that criteria I was alotted a team whose work was in hardware but at System level. So no actual transistors, ICs or diodes for me.
When I used to be in college , I used to think which is the one company for which I will like to work and the name that used to come to mind was STMicroelectronics because it was the only company that had electronics in its name ..lol..jokes apart because it was quite an elusive company for people from my college and I had a feeling that it was more into VLSI then any other company in the NCR. Currently I am in ST and before I came here, my batchmates and collegemates had already made it one of the realities for all my college people. So won't say it was a dream come true because long before I stopped thinking about it.
Adding to the irony of my life, the day I got the Engineering degree in my hand, I had a strong feeling that I should have opted for Medical as that would have been more close to serving people. That day all the fears of drawing things went out of the box and there was an urge to cure people of their miseries and even thought of enquiring about doing higher secondary again in Medical stream so that I could be a doctor.
My stay at HCL again can't be termed as something of a dream come true but it was indeed one of the best learning experience of my life. Just after joining HCL, I was presented with the opportunity to work for an onshore client, right here in Noida and for that I had to appear for an interview. Now here I got an oportunity to prove myself because I have heard about a lot of people who appeared for the same n got rejected. So worked hard (again not harder) and cleared that. There at Coware I did something which I won't say was totally related to my education or something I wanted to do because I din't know what I wanted to do but I really found it interesting. As I got to design and develop IPs, simulate hardwares and explore architectures of SoCs etc.
So after working for HCL for almost 2 years, I decided to move ahead, not because I had to do something with my life or had to fulfil some dream, it was just because I had to.
Right now I am working in ST, knowing I am doing something related to hardware something similar to what I was doing earlier at HCL/CoWare but still that dream is not there. The thing that I will want to do, the thing that will keep me busy, keep me awake or will make me fall sleep because of hard work I put up the whole day, the thing on doing which I will be elated , the thing which will make me pat my back myself on accomplishing that, which I will say I achieved....the Dream that will be a real dream for me ..........

F.R.I.E.N.D.S

Arguably the best stress buster for me. No matter how bad I feel or how low I am feeling I just need to see one episode of this serial and I feel so refreshed , so happy. Just feel like life is again injected in me.

I din't see this sitcom when it was getting aired for the first time. I used to hear from people that it is one of the best comedy sitcom but I never felt the urge to see it. But few months back, I decided to download this and watch it and see what so good about it. And once I started watching it, I din't stop before I watched every episode till season 10. And even now when I have completed it , I see it again whenever I need a laugh or just idling around.

Well most of the people know what it is all about but just to mention, its a story of six friends Ross, Rachel, Chandler, Monica, Joey and Phoebe, who have their own shares of joys and troubles. Ross's wife is lesbian and she leaves him and after that he gets married to Emily but at the time of wedding instead of taking her name he utters Rachel and then he marries Rachel when both of them are drunk at Vegas and get that marriage annulled too but at the end of season 10 he gets her back(something people who have not seen the complete series should not know :)). Then we have Rachel who runs away on her marraige day as she doesn't love that guy and then she lands up at Monica's who is her school time friend and starts her independent life where she first works as a waitress then follows her dream of working in fashion world. She falls in love with Ross, breaks up, then have a baby with him and finally gets back to him. Then we have Monica who is Ross's little sister, she is a chef and is quite particular about keeping her surrounding tidy. I feel she was the least troubled person in that sitcom. The only problem with her was that she din't have a stable relation but after 5-6 season even that goes away. Then comes Chandler who is Ross's college time friend and who cannot distinguish between his mother and father(his father is a cross dresser). His problem is similar to Monica that he never had any stable relation thats why I feel they got together and married each other. The other problem with him was he din't like the work he was doing and wanted to do something he really liked. Then comes Joey, the guy who is never deprived of girls. He is an actor who intially struggles and does some very petty and funny roles but later on becomes a soap opera star. He is most funniest and dumb guy who enjoys eating, relaxing and flirting. Last but never the least, Phoebe Buffet, my favorite character. She is so funny and everytime full of doing and telling silly things.Her song "Smelly cat" explains the kind of stuff she speaks and do. A really lively character. Her problem is that she never had a normal life. Her mother commited suicide, she was brought up in streets, she doesn't have a stable job , never went to college but finally she also finds someone with whom she can lead a normal life.

So thats it for the brief about the sitcom. Well what I really liked about this serial is the way it depicts each and every sphere of life. I mean as the name suggests it is definitly about friends , the bonds that friends share, what they go through when they stay together, the way they share everything, how they are there for each other when they are sad or in problem. But the thing I really liked about this sitcom is the way they celebrated when they were happy. No doubt friends are always there when you are going through rough waters but its the happy moments that we spend with our friends that I feel good about. I mean the way they hug each other , clap with each other when they are happy , thats makes you feel so happy. The way they celebrate festivals, birthdays , marriages, the way they always share their happy moments with each other and gets so restless to tell each other about it that makes me feel this is what one wants in life. Having never lived away from my family, I never experienced those moments you share when you are living with your friends, so this sitcom made me live those moments.

Well I do not associate myself with that serial but yes there are so many moments that people can associate with their life. You can feel those characters, the moment they share , the laughs , the humor, the friendship and the love .
As the song of the serial goes..... I be there for you....summarizes everything that F.R.I.E.N.D.S is all about.
I always ask myself a question, whom out of the three guys would I love to be or I associate the most?

1. Joey - No, I don't think I am either good looking like him or a tube light like him.

2. Ross - I share something common with him :) but I am not guy who will have 3 marriages.

3. Chandler - I don't know what is common within me and chandler apart from the fact that his profession is somewhat closest to mine but he is the guy whom I would love to be like because he is funny, clever and innocent.
Hope that the makers of this hit sitcom will definitly come up with a new season or a movie pretty soon. I don't know whether the movie will be a hit or not but the sitcom is definitly the best thing to have happened ever....

Kal ho na ho.....

Well this post is not a review of the SRK flick which came few years back, this is more about the literally meaning of this sentence. Today I was reading someone's blog about Ishmeet Singh, the winner of last year's VOI reality show, who very unfortunately died yesterday while swimming at one of the hotel in Maldives where he had gone for a concert. Well I din't remember the exact words of that blog but the message that the blogger wanted to convey touched me a lot and scared me too.
I have come across the same message a lot of times before too and everytime it made me think about it but never scared me this much.
What the blogger wanted to convey citing Ishmeet's incidence was that life is very unpredictable. One day you are on the top of this world and the very next day you are indeed literally at top of this world. When we are alive we are too busy with our daily chores that we forget to live. We forgot to tell people how much they matter to us, how much we love them, how much we care for them. We don't do a lot of things that we would love to do, things that will give us pleasure and make us happy. And before we do or realise all this we are no longer there in this world.
I mean with the kind of things happening around the world nowadays no one can say for sure that when they leave home in the morning they will be savely back in the evening. You never know where there will be a bomb blast happening or you can never gurantee that flyover that you are going below will not fall on your head crushing you instantly or you will meet with an accident which occured because of no fault of yours. Ok I know it sounds too pessimistic but thats the truth. You never know when will you meet your end. At that time, all the things that we are left to tell to our loved ones will be buried along with us. All the things we want to do will be left undone.
I am also one of those guys who is so full of things to do but is quite content in letting things happen on there own. If I will have to say then I will say that I don't have the courage or motivation to do things. I know its just a lame excuse but I always believe that may be I don't have that courage but others on reading this may gather that courage or motivation to do all the things they want to do. May be they will go and tell people how much they love them or they are sorry for hurting them. They will again get in touch with their lost friends before its too late.

I came across a quote few days back which was about taking pictures which goes like this "Your birth certifcate tells that you were born, your death certificate tells that you died but it is the photos that you take that tells that you lived". So I improvised it in this way to ask everyone a question "Your birth certifcate tells that you were born, your death certificate tells that you died but what is there that will tell that you lived ?"

So guys get up.. live life before its too late....Har pal yahan jee bar jiyo, jo hai Shama..Kal Ho na Ho ....

Enjoy life...