Have created a new parallel blog to list all the posts that are either taken from internet or are forwarded mails.
In order to view those posts please visit
http://goodies-at-me-n-myself.blogspot.com/
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Neha........ I
Walking through that busy corridor , scanning every face on my way to find at least one face that does not have “Don’t bother I am busy ” board, I finally stumbled on a door and without stopping to check what room it was, I simply pushed open the door.
As I entered a dozen pair of eyes turned their focus on me and the whole room which was a moment ago buzzing with activity was turned into a silence which is similar to the one we have when a teacher enters a noisy class. But it didn’t took them long to make out that’s not the case.
As I was going from one pair of eyes to another looking for a familiar eye suddenly my eyes stopped, wow, two big round sparkling eyes were looking at me. I could see nothing beyond those eyes as if there were only those two eyes floating. So clear, so magnificent, so full of life, full with sparkle that could lighten up the whole universe. I was so lost in those eyes that I did not know that since how long I did not blink.
“What do you want?” an angry voice blurted out from somewhere, which brought me back to the reality and made me realise that there were other people too in that room. I somehow turned my eyes trying to find out from where did that noise came and asked “Sorry”.
The voice again said “What are you doing here?” This time I could see who it was. I sheepishly replied,” Sorry to disturb, actually I was looking for my friend, Ruchi, she told me that she will be down this corridor.” Then before I could finish, a voice as soft as sponge, came from the back “Oh, she just went outside, she will be right back”. I turned in that direction and man, it was her, and like Dorothy said to Jerry in Jerry Maguire “Shut Up, You had me at Hello”, I could not make out anything after Oh. I was again in that fantasy world but this time I could see the face too. If eyes were huge and vast as ocean, the face was that of an angel, so white, so pure. If eyes had that sparkle of stars then the face had that brightness of sun, so vibrant. Her cheeks were white and were giving a tempting signal to come and pull them.
As I entered a dozen pair of eyes turned their focus on me and the whole room which was a moment ago buzzing with activity was turned into a silence which is similar to the one we have when a teacher enters a noisy class. But it didn’t took them long to make out that’s not the case.
As I was going from one pair of eyes to another looking for a familiar eye suddenly my eyes stopped, wow, two big round sparkling eyes were looking at me. I could see nothing beyond those eyes as if there were only those two eyes floating. So clear, so magnificent, so full of life, full with sparkle that could lighten up the whole universe. I was so lost in those eyes that I did not know that since how long I did not blink.
“What do you want?” an angry voice blurted out from somewhere, which brought me back to the reality and made me realise that there were other people too in that room. I somehow turned my eyes trying to find out from where did that noise came and asked “Sorry”.
The voice again said “What are you doing here?” This time I could see who it was. I sheepishly replied,” Sorry to disturb, actually I was looking for my friend, Ruchi, she told me that she will be down this corridor.” Then before I could finish, a voice as soft as sponge, came from the back “Oh, she just went outside, she will be right back”. I turned in that direction and man, it was her, and like Dorothy said to Jerry in Jerry Maguire “Shut Up, You had me at Hello”, I could not make out anything after Oh. I was again in that fantasy world but this time I could see the face too. If eyes were huge and vast as ocean, the face was that of an angel, so white, so pure. If eyes had that sparkle of stars then the face had that brightness of sun, so vibrant. Her cheeks were white and were giving a tempting signal to come and pull them.
As she could easily make out from the quizzical look on my face that I did not understand anything, she repeated in that magical voice “She went to get some papers, she will be back soon”. This time I had to hear and said “Ok, Thanks” and gave her a smile and before I could see whether she had returned my smile, the same angry voice came out” You can go and wait in her room”. And before I could say anything, my angel replied “You can wait here”, with a smile that could infuse life in dead.
But sensing that others may not like that idea, I looked around and said “Thanks, but I won’t bother, you people carry on with your activity”, with a smile mainly directed at the angry soul. I think this mellowed him down a little.
Then another voice came out,”Then you have to participate in that”. I could only muster “Ok, what I have to do?” Soon the room was again full of noise with each one shouting instruction to another. I put my bag down and was asked to stand at one corner. They started passing a plastic ball around.
I again looked at her, she was bursting with laughter and some of them were finding it hard to hold the ball and each time anyone missed it, it started a fleet of laughter. I was so lost in their laughter that I did not notice the ball being thrown at me and I did not have time to react and it hit me on the face. Everybody started laughing hilariously but my angel wasn’t. She asked me with concern in her voice“Did it hurt?” I said No and started laughing and she also started laughing. I picked up the ball and shouted “It’s now my turn to get you guys” and threw it lightly to person diagonally opposite, he caught it and soon we again started throwing around.
After a while we all got tired, and everyone started relaxing. I walked across to where she was and started looking from the window which was next to her. Then I looked towards her and I saw her panting but she looked still as vibrant as before. I asked, “That was fun”. Without commenting she asked “So you are a Magician, too?” Magician, I thought the only magic I could do is the card trick, in which you ask the person to pick one card and see it and you without seeing it put it back after turning it 180 degree, so that all other cards have same orientation of picture except the one he picked and that will also be a trick only to people who have not seen it earlier. So after a thought I replied with amazement “No...I am not.” She said “Oh, so you don’t work here.” I replied, “No, I just came to see my friend.” She said, “Oh, Yes”.
But sensing that others may not like that idea, I looked around and said “Thanks, but I won’t bother, you people carry on with your activity”, with a smile mainly directed at the angry soul. I think this mellowed him down a little.
Then another voice came out,”Then you have to participate in that”. I could only muster “Ok, what I have to do?” Soon the room was again full of noise with each one shouting instruction to another. I put my bag down and was asked to stand at one corner. They started passing a plastic ball around.
I again looked at her, she was bursting with laughter and some of them were finding it hard to hold the ball and each time anyone missed it, it started a fleet of laughter. I was so lost in their laughter that I did not notice the ball being thrown at me and I did not have time to react and it hit me on the face. Everybody started laughing hilariously but my angel wasn’t. She asked me with concern in her voice“Did it hurt?” I said No and started laughing and she also started laughing. I picked up the ball and shouted “It’s now my turn to get you guys” and threw it lightly to person diagonally opposite, he caught it and soon we again started throwing around.
After a while we all got tired, and everyone started relaxing. I walked across to where she was and started looking from the window which was next to her. Then I looked towards her and I saw her panting but she looked still as vibrant as before. I asked, “That was fun”. Without commenting she asked “So you are a Magician, too?” Magician, I thought the only magic I could do is the card trick, in which you ask the person to pick one card and see it and you without seeing it put it back after turning it 180 degree, so that all other cards have same orientation of picture except the one he picked and that will also be a trick only to people who have not seen it earlier. So after a thought I replied with amazement “No...I am not.” She said “Oh, so you don’t work here.” I replied, “No, I just came to see my friend.” She said, “Oh, Yes”.
“So, you like Magic?” I asked her. “Yes, very much, Ruchi Di always does that, whenever anybody is in pain, she does something and it vanishes, whenever anyone is sad, she hugs him and they become happy.”
Pain, Sad... these words rang in my head and before I could think more, I heard a familiar voice “So here you are, sorry I got stuck somewhere”. And all the children gave a cry of excitement “Didi has come”.
I looked at her white coat and then looked around, and everything seemed new to me now.
Then a Nurse entered and shouted “Dinner time.” Everyone ran back to their bed. Ruchi said looking at me,” Come, let’s go”. Then she looked at the children and said “Good Night everyone, See you all tomorrow”. I was staring at my angel. She was getting ready for her dinner. Ruchi caught my hand and ushered me outside.
I couldn’t say anything, something stuck me. I just walked out and glanced at the plate hanging at the door.
It read “CHILDREN’S CANCER WARD”
She looked at me and asked “Are you Ok?” I sat down at the bench and just closed my eyes. She said “I know, let’s go”. I uttered”My bag...” and ran back.
The moment I entered she looked at me. I went to her; she said “Good Night, Will you come again?” I said “Good Night dear, Yes, I will.” Kissed her forehead, picked my bag and everybody looked at me and said “Bye, Good Night”. I got a meek smile on my face and said “Bye, Good Night” and ran away.
That’s Neha, a seven year old angel, suffering from leukaemia (blood cancer).........
"Its all imagination that I have penned down,
but somehow I feel someday you will be running around
I will hold you in my hands, hear you say "I Love you",
and hug me tight and will stop the tears flowing down
But till that time, I will have to put the Disclaimer down."
All the thoughts mentioned above are author's imagination and any resemblance to anyone alive,dead, healthy or ill is purely coincidental and unintentional and any information cited is purely fictional.
Pain, Sad... these words rang in my head and before I could think more, I heard a familiar voice “So here you are, sorry I got stuck somewhere”. And all the children gave a cry of excitement “Didi has come”.
I looked at her white coat and then looked around, and everything seemed new to me now.
Then a Nurse entered and shouted “Dinner time.” Everyone ran back to their bed. Ruchi said looking at me,” Come, let’s go”. Then she looked at the children and said “Good Night everyone, See you all tomorrow”. I was staring at my angel. She was getting ready for her dinner. Ruchi caught my hand and ushered me outside.
I couldn’t say anything, something stuck me. I just walked out and glanced at the plate hanging at the door.
It read “CHILDREN’S CANCER WARD”
She looked at me and asked “Are you Ok?” I sat down at the bench and just closed my eyes. She said “I know, let’s go”. I uttered”My bag...” and ran back.
The moment I entered she looked at me. I went to her; she said “Good Night, Will you come again?” I said “Good Night dear, Yes, I will.” Kissed her forehead, picked my bag and everybody looked at me and said “Bye, Good Night”. I got a meek smile on my face and said “Bye, Good Night” and ran away.
That’s Neha, a seven year old angel, suffering from leukaemia (blood cancer).........
"Its all imagination that I have penned down,
but somehow I feel someday you will be running around
I will hold you in my hands, hear you say "I Love you",
and hug me tight and will stop the tears flowing down
But till that time, I will have to put the Disclaimer down."
All the thoughts mentioned above are author's imagination and any resemblance to anyone alive,dead, healthy or ill is purely coincidental and unintentional and any information cited is purely fictional.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Problem - I
The basic problem with ME is that I preview things to happen in a certain way. I construct the incidents that are going to happen in future in my mind. Play the conversation that is going to happen, the sequence , what words will be said, what things will be done , what way they will be done and rehearse all these things zillions of time in my head. So my mind rewinds that video and when the actual moment comes it EXPECTS that video to unwind.
But 99.9999% times it won't and it shouldn't. So irrespective of what happened, how good that incident went or how worse it was, there will be sense of disappoinment.
Solution -
1. Stop thinking and expecting (Most of them say this) but I love to think and expect.
2. Take control of the situation, that will atleast let me play my part the way I thought..sounds interesting
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