Thursday, April 29, 2010

Helps to talk ...

Last Friday I attended a HR training on Team Building, so in that our trainer was citing an example while discussing inter personal relationship. So the example he cited was like this.

It was related to him and his colleague in HR. So our trainer had an experience of 7-8 years at that time and this other guy just joined in. So as we all know that HR guys are so jolly and how they always greet everyone loudly, so our trainer thought that he should make this guy feel comfortable so he went across his seat and waved him big Hi but this guy din't acknowledge that and just continued with his work. So now our trainer got really agitated because of that and from that day onwards he thought I will show this guy and everyday he used to pass through his cubicle despite it being on the wrong way of his own seat so that he could just pass through him without acknowledging him. In short he started sulking and doing things so unlike his cheerful behavior. This he did for a week then he could no longer take it, so one day he decided to confront him and tell him that his behavior that day hurt him. So one day without having any work he stayed back as this guy used to stay back daily and he went to his seat after everyone has left and he uttered his name and said I have to talk to you about something and this guy without looking at him just said "whats the matter" and just then hearing his tone our trainer realised that this guy has no issues with him and infact he don't even know that there is something wrong and our trainer thus realised his mistake and then he just changed his tone andcheerful inquired after him, his family and after that he became normal and stopped sulking.


Now although there are many points to discuss here but the point that he mentioned next is what this post is all about. He said that whenever you have a problem with anyone it only helps to talk with that person and no matter how many friends or well wishers you talk to its irrelevant.


I agree that yes it can be only resolved when you talk to the concerned person but at times when that is not possible , at that time I feel talking to anyone does help. For me there are two points why I say so. First whenever we talk to someone we feel light, for some moment we feel that the thing that is bothering us does not exist or it has been shared with someone else and second is as with my case most of the time I find people behave or react in a manner quite contrary to what I expect, when I tell them what is bothering. They reply in such a manner which shows a completely different perspective then what I am thinking. So this thing helps me to accept the things.

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